Teenage Gangs-The New Family Structure?

"Young men ... you have value.

You were not born to snatch the life

out of people you don't even know"

Rev. Ora Stearns-Smith

In July of 2007, Rev. Ora Stearns-Smith got the worst possible call a mother can received. Her son, Aric Jai-Shon Lexing, had become the victim of a teenage gang shooting, and had died from his injuries. Jai was not a gang member ... not then ...not ever. No, he was a young man who had said yes to someone he barely knew, who asked him for a ride home after a party. Apparently, the passenger was on a local gang's hit list. As Jai and his passenger pulled up and stopped the car, the shooting started and the gang got their target ... and took Jai's life as well. Ironically, Jai had just received his Masters in Criminal Justice just two months earlier in May, 2007, and was waiting to pursue a career in law enforcement. Sadly, the lives of everyone that Jai had touched would be changed forever.

Teenage gang-related statics are truly no more than best estimates. The obvious reasons are that it's not realistic to believe that people can go door-to-door and gather information any more than it is to think that there is an office where gangs and gang members go to register their activity.

According to one online statistical source and a 2009 estimate, there are approximately 24,500 gangs in the U.S, and one million gang members. It would be wonderful, since these are estimated numbers, if the statistics represented were overstated. My fear, however, is that they could actually be understated.

So, the obvious question is what should we, as a united front, do about this? We all do a lot of gasping, shaking our heads, and talking about it. But, what are we doing about it? And who is to blame for the increasing number of teenagers (and much younger) choosing gangs as their family. Is it the parents, the school system, movies, t.v, music, the lack of teenage role models (I mean the good kind), the law and lack of stricter penalties......or is it....etc...etc...and so on.

We don't pretend to have the answers. We are asking you. Who do you think is responsible for the increasing number of violent gangs in the U.S., and what do you think we should do about it?

We will take this a step further and ask you to join us next Thursday, January 28, 2010, at noon (12:00 pm EST) as we discuss this very topic in our segment of Teenage Gang Violence at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/threewisegirls. I encourage you to call in and talk with us at 1-347-994-3835. It's not an interview, it's a conversation, and we would like for you to be a part of it.

Just talking about the problem falls short of actually eliminating the problem. That will take action on everyone's part. But talking about it is a good beginning.

Cougars...love 'em or...

Time to blast the myths...Cougars are smart, savvy, confident women that are not ruled by a number - they are sure of who they are and not afraid to go where no one has gone before. Gone are the days where an older woman with a younger man is considered desperate, or a sugar mama. Cougars are the new 40ish woman that knows what she wants and isn't going to worry about what someone else thinks about her going out and getting it.

Times are changing and the older woman/younger man relationship is the hottest ticket out there. For so long it was socially unacceptable, although it makes much more sense since women don't need a "little blue pill" to keep up with their partner...lucky us!!! But trust us - being a cougar is so much more than that - although there is nothing wrong with "that", is there???

It's me, Dori, the only one of the Three Wise Girls that is not married, and the one that hit both demographics. I am in my 40's, single and the older I am the younger the men asking me out. I also look over the other side of the fence as the mother of 2 20-something sons that are very mature for their age who have always attracted older girls, and someday, older women.

So, here I sit, gazing at both sides. As a "cougar" I must confess that I wasn't attracted to young guys when I was young myself. I am attracted to confidence and maturing and that air of confidence that usually comes with age. I did have one experience a few years ago with someone 14 years younger than me and we were just in different places, he was looking to settle down and start a family and, while I do want to find someone to share that part of my life with, he would have only been Mr. Right-now for me, and that wasn't enough for either one of us.

I have always tried not to judge others I would like to think that I would be cool if my sons came home with on of my "peers" as their date, but I can't be sure. I can only hope that if and when it does one day happen, she is someone who will share the benefits of her experience and be gentle and not break his heart. (Anyone out there remember "Tea and Sympathy?) My friend Tina once said to me that if one of my sons liked older women that she wanted to throw her hat in the ring. She also promised that she would teach him so well that the women who came after her would be putting flowers on her grave in thanks!

All kidding aside, men have had that Hollywood "Mrs. Robinson" fantasy for a long time, because it was the one place that it has always been in vogue to see younger men with older women. Finally the rest of the world is catching up, and cougars are the new "It" Girl.

So, with all that said, are you a smart, sexy woman that finds that they are attracting younger men that see you for the amazing catch that you are, or perhaps you are the mom of one of the younger men that are mature enough to capture a cougars attention. Whatever side of the fence you are on...come talk with us about it. The Three Wise Girls want to blast myths, share our experiences and hear all about yours. Tune in to our Blog Talk Radio Show - http://www.blogtalkradio.com/ThreeWiseGirls every Thursday at 12pm EST - or email us at threewisegirls@gmail.com. Join us as we share our views and learn about yours.

Join TWGs Segment: In Dreams-When last night's dream become reality today

"A candy-colored clown they call the sandman
Tiptoes to my room every night
Just to sprinkle stardust and to whisper -
Go to sleep. Everything is all right."
Roy Orbison "In Dreams"

Ever had a dream at night that haunted you next morning, stayed with you throughout the day ... and then became a reality? Some of you reading this have, but maybe you just wrote it off as a coincidence, or maybe you were afraid to mention it for fear of being laughed at ... or maybe you were just afraid. Here is your chance to tell us about your experiences. Or at least here is your opportunity to listen to others who have had experiences, or are very well-versed in dream interpretation. And here is your chance to hear TWG's Debbie Barth talk about her dream of death and when the reality in the truth of the dream materialized.

Join us January 14, 2010 at noon EST for a fascinating hour of "In Dreams". We invite you to call in at 1-347-994-3835 and join in our conversation. You can also listen on the internet and participate in the chatroom by going to http://blogtalkradio.com/threewisegirls Think dreams and dream interpretations are a lot of hoooey, that's ok, we want to hear from you too. For those who plan on calling in, shoot us an email at threewisegirls@gmail.com, and we'd be happy to allow you to promote your business, service, or radio show. For a taste of the upcoming show, read Debbie's blog entry taken from her personal blog.

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I guess most people dream at night (or day, depending on when they sleep, i.e. vampires), at least every so often. I feel sorry for those that never dream, as dreams can be quite entertaining, as well as enlightening. I'm not a dream expert, specialist, or doctor (is there such a thing?), but I can tell you how often I dream (often), that I dream in color (technicolor), and that I dream in "symbolism". I also dream about events that have actually occurred. Not so often, only a handful of times in my life.

I will always remember the first time this happened, of course. Actually, I should say the first time I knew it happened. This dream involved an event that happened to my brother's best friend (loved as a part of our family), living in Georgia. My brother and I were both living in Florida at the time. When I told my brother about the dream, he looked at me strangely (not necessarily an uncommon look from him), and called our friend immediately from my apartment. Long story short, I had dreamt about an event that had actually taken place a couple of days earlier. The time of day, location, etc. was right on the money. As this was something that was not meant to be of common knowledge, they knew that I really had no way of knowing this. This was in the 70's and it would be a long while before I had another dream like this. At least, of that I'm aware.

There have been a few more, but the other one that I will most likely not forget was the one in which John died.

I dreamt that I was walking down the isle leading to my office at work early one morning, when I noticed people had gathered around outside John's office. As I approached, I asked someone what had happened. Someone replied, "John died." I don't remember much of the dream other than that. I went to work that morning (awake this time), and the day was really no different than any other day. In conversation with a co-worker, I mentioned the dream I had about John. I also told him that I dreamed in "symbolism" and that the dream might not have anything to do with this particular person, and jokingly suggested that he be careful going out to lunch. Much to my relief, the day passed with no one, especially not John, dying.

The next morning, I came in earlier than usual to work. The secretary came into my office, knelt down and whispered, "did you hear what happened to John?" When I answered that I had not, she said, "He committed suicide last night!" I just sat and stared at her. As much as I was naturally shocked, of course, she had no idea about the dream I had the night before. As I said earlier, I dream in "symbolism". The John who had died was not the one across from me, but the one downstairs, with which I had recently worked on some reports. I heard Butch when he came into his office. I went over to him and could tell he had already heard the news. I started to speak and he said, "I don't even want to talk about it." "You scare me ...", meaning the conversation we'd had earlier.

Now, I am sharing this with you, not because I think "I'm special" (I do think my husband and Jake the beagle think this however), or because I want to change or challenge your skeptical minds. I just believe that this happens more often than people think. I think there are people that realize they have just dreamt about a very real event they had no earlier knowledge of, but choose not to comment, simply because they are afraid of being scoffed and laughed at. And of course there is the "it's just a coincidence" response as well.

I am actually rather cynical about people's intentions (comes with age I guess) and truly don't believe in all of the self-professed psychics, mediums, and intuitives. However, I know that it happens with me and therefore, I have to believe it happens with others as well.

If you have a story about a dream or recurrent dream that proves itself to be an actual event, be bold, be real, and share it with us. Maybe you know someone who has experienced this. Maybe you believe that this really happens, or maybe you think it's a "crock". That's fine if you think it's a crock. I doubt if you would find yourself on my Christmas card list, anyway.

Christophe Vanderhogan-Landry & 2010

The Three Wise Girls have decided to follow a new path for 2010. Call it a New Year’s Resolution, or an epiphany … either way, call it a smart move. We’ve developed a new mantra, “It’s a conversation, not an interview,” and we intend to focus mostly on topics, rather than only on specific people. This will allow us to embrace a larger audience. Certainly the topics we might cover on any random week’s show are topics that will relate to most anyone—dreams, funny people, whether you love or hate sports, cookies … and who-knows-how-many-other subjects of day-to-day life. We, The Three Wise Girls, will offer you the forum. You call in and talk to us about the “Subject du Jour,” or in proper French, “Suject du Jour.” At least I think that’s proper French. I’m sure you’ll tell me if it isn’t.

Now with all that said and speaking of French, we DO have a special guest for our very first show of 2010. After all, rules are made to be broken, aren’t they? At least occasionally. And if we’re the ones who made the rules, heck, on occasion we may just have to break them.



Our topic for January 7, 2010 will be race relations, cultural identification, and the truly unique world of all things Louisiana. Christophe Vanderhogan-Landry was born in New Iberia, LA. French-Creole by cultural identification, American by nationality, Christophe works tirelessly to reinvigorate and revitalize the Creole and French languages. He has mastered multiple languages, including the nearly-lost art of speaking Creole—a heritage as much as a way of speaking. He’s a mixed-race international American citizen who advocates for racial equality through coming together, not separation.

We’d love to have you call in to this conversation. The show willl air LIVE on Thursday, January 7, 2010, noon - 1 PM EST, on Blog Talk Radio. Check out our link: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/threewisegirls. The call-in number: 347-994-3835. We also have a chatroom so if you can't get through on the phone at any given time, please jump into the chatroom and let us know you're there!

Please join us and listen to Christophe's take on racial equality. Give us your own. His is a viewpoint you've probably not heard often, and whether you agree with him or not, it’s a viewpoint you’ll want to hear. What makes us who we are? Is it our heritage, our profession, our language, our culture, our color? Or is it the sum total of all of that? Louisiana's own Christophe Vanderhogan-Landry has his own take on this topic, and he is truly one of a kind!

Beverly Mahone First Featured Guest on Three Wise Girls BTR!

I knew, the first moment I met her in person that Beverly Mahone was a force to be reckoned with. There was absotively no question. I’d already gotten involved with her Boomer Diva Nation group but when I walked into the auditorium in Baltimore where the book signing was being held, one of which we were both a part, who was the first person to really greet me and genuinely engage with me, one-on-one? Our own Bev Mahone, of course. Ever since that initial in-person connection, I’ve been literally amazed with this woman. I do believe if you look up the term “powerhouse” in any dictionary, anywhere, you’re going to find Bev’s picture. No further explanation is required.



From just an idea, a dream of what could be, Beverly Mahone has built Boomer Diva Nation into a thriving, inspiring, and undoubtedly beneficial organization to better the lives of those of us “of a certain age” who are forging forward into middle years and beyond, with excitement, verve, and a belief that every single day can be better than the next. Many say age is nothing but a number. I don’t agree. I think age is, as Debbie Barth, a fellow member of Three Wise Girls pronounced this morning, “a badge of experience.” And what good is experience if we don’t try to use ours to better the lives of every individual whose paths we cross?

Beverly has done, and continues to do, exactly that. The woman must never sleep. She has more ideas than anyone I’ve ever met . . . ideas, mind you, that she actually implements. No astroturf grows under this woman’s feet! You can be almost certain that if a possibility crosses her mind that can be turned into a positive reality for her Boomer Diva Nation group—Bev is not going to let that option get away from her. She’s direct, to-the-point, and a true businesswoman . . . a businesswoman with heart and soul who's had many experiences and wants to share whatever she can to help wherever and whenever she can.

So for any of you who’ve ever had a dream—I hope you’ll be listening in to the Three Wise Girl’s debut show, live, on Thursday, October 1, 2009 at noon. Let Beverly Mahone share with you how it’s never impossible to fulfill that dream . . . and oh-so-much more.

Find Bev at Beverly Mahone’s Boomer Diva Nation:
http://www.boomerdivanation.com

Three Wise Girls, BLOG Talk Radio, & Rorschach ... & Pam Archer

Ha ha ha ha ha ... I'm laughing so hard right now. Can't stop. Here I was, reading and re-reading, and reading again, Pam Archer's reply to my post, "Are You A Wise Girl?" She asked, "By the way, what is Blot Talk Radio?" and I kept thinking, "Hmmm ... surely Pam knows that it's BLOG Talk Radio and definitely knows what it is."

You dum-dum, Linda!!!! I just read my post yet again. Blot Talk Radio ... to answer your question, Pam, I guess that's where we give the Rorschach Test to our guests to see what they see--and if we can see the same thing. Clearly, our friends are seeing what's right ... and Linda needs a new pair of glasses. Or maybe just a brainwave test to see if they're really still working.

Oh Linda, how senile can we get?!

A Brave New World--Technology, Skype, Love, and Kazakhstan

It’s a brave new world and I can prove it. One of our sons met a young lady at the University of Alabama. He’s from Florida. She is from Kazakhstan. As in the Republic of Kazakhstan. As in the Russian/Chinese neighborhood. Like … not around the corner. Nowhere near.

They fell in love. She soon had to go home. They didn’t want to be apart and in, oh, maybe the last month, we learned they were getting married. In Kazakhstan. We were invited, but that’s not the sort of thing where you hop online, buy a ticket, pack your bags, and run to the airport. Especially if you don’t have a passport, and your husband’s is expired.

Plans may have suffered a bit in translation. They were made in Kazakhstan, in their language. We got intermittent details. So it was a mishmash when the phone rang last night—they’re eleven hours ahead—about a wedding today. Today for us, anywho. For them … tomorrow. We continued to try and call back into the night but the call wouldn’t go through. This morning, Hubby had to go out early for an issue which couldn’t be put off. An out-of-town’er was here for a business deal. When our phone rang at 9 AM, a heavily accented woman’s voice said she was a translator. Richard couldn’t be on the phone since he was “outside having a wedding.” An hour later, Richard called, asking me to get on Skype and watch the reception.

I’ve used Skype—with my wonderful Three Wise Girls buddies—but never video. I didn’t know my laptop had video. Shows how techno-aware I am. Hubby walked in then; between us, we got it. Should’ve seen my face when I saw video on my laptop! Should’ve seen my face since, thanks to the hoopla, I wasn’t wearing make-up. Not good since we had to toast the lovely couple—with soda—and on camera for wedding party and guests. We chatted with bride and groom and her parents … via translator (except for Richard).

That took up the morning. Hubby and I learned about Kazakhstan and a new culture. Mastered Skype in a big way. Then went out and bought a videocam and spent the afternoon playing with grandkids—in California. Now that I’m a pro with this techno stuff … she says with tongue firmly planted in cheek … I’m jumping into the brave new world to use knowledge for business as well as family fun. It came at me real fast and I’m going to embrace it the same way. Three Wise Girls … Debbie and Dori—I feel SO sorry for you!!